"Elin gets killed"

Massive!!!! zombie story apparently written for/at school on November 4, 1992.
Translated yesterday. Inspired by Ötzi the Iceman and probably some episode of Ghostbusters.

*******************************

One day, Elin was out walking in the woods.
"I think I'm gonna go to the Tarn", Elin thought and went to the Tarn. She sat down on a rock. Then she heard CRASH CREAK from the other side of the Tarn. Elin looked that way. She almost fainted. Because along the shoreline - straight towards Elin - came an old green farmer who had risen from his grave! He was holding a shovel... And when Elin tried to take it, it disappeared. Then Elin woke up and ran home. Dad was sitting at the computer, working.
"DAD DAD!!!" Elin screamed. "DO YOU KNOW...!" She could say no more before dad turned around. His face was brown and dry. It was... THE ICEMAN!!! Then a whole bunch of old farmers stormed in. The iceman and the farmers killed Elin and threw the body in the Tarn.

"Elin and Indiana Jones"

~Indiana Jones / Rescuers Down Under fanfic thingy
~Also starring: the cool alter egos of my buddy and me, our imaginary horses, &c.
~Written in 1993 + maybe later
~Translated tonight
~By: Ratexla
*** SUCK WARNING *** SUCK WARNING ***

One day when Elin and Millan were with Marahoo*, creaking sounds were heard from the forest. Mara and Blackie, who were their horses, got scared and whinnied.

- Did you hear something, Indy?
- Yes.
- We have to check what it is!
- What if it's a snake?!
- No. Come on now.

When Elin and Millan saw the two dark shadows they cried for Help!!!

- There they are! Indiana Jones roared.
- Marahoo, said Elin and patted Marahoo, now you gotta help us. Cover up the eggs.

Marahoo covered up the eggs.

- Now take one man in each claw and drop them in the creek.

Marahoo did as Elin had said. One of the men, James Bond, got water in his lungs and died. Marahoo ate him. Indiana Jones drifted towards the little waterfall. Elin and Millan didn't notice anything. They were re-sewing James Bond's clothes into sleeping bags and cases. Suddenly an ensanguined** and wet Indy stood before them.

- We're here shooting a film. You're not supposed to be here. In a short while I and the director will come and get the bird. Good bye.

Elin and Millan stared. They had to hide Marahoo and the eggs! Elin got to load the eggs into a box and tuck them in as warmly as she could and Millan packed food. And so they took off and flew southeast, towards Gotland. Down below they saw Indy and the director.

- You're standing half a metre from a snake pit, just so you know! Elin yelled.

Indy roared with horror, but it was just a woodlouse pit.

Elin, Millan and Marahoo were having a great time. It was May 17*** already and the sun was shining. After a few hours they saw a black stripe on the horizon. GOTLAND!!!

They settled down in a forest a few kilometres from Katthammarsvik. Elin recognised a farm. She and Millan had stayed there a few weeks each summer when they were little. Here they would remain until Indy could be assumed to have given up. They started building a hut right away. Then Marahoo wanted food. She found some dead rabbits. Elin lit a fire to keep away mosquitoes and the cold. Then they fell asleep under Marahoo's wings.

The next morning it was totally windless and +33.9 degrees Celsius. Marahoo signed that Elin and Millan had to go to the beach alone, because she had to guard the eggs. Elin and Millan protested, but eventually they went.

The water was freezing but nice and Elin and Millan dove among the giant waves that the warm winds**** brought with them. Suddenly they saw Marahoo writing in the sand and they ran there. "Indy has come here!"

They jumped onto Marahoo and flew to the eggs. They packed them and took off. Suddenly they heard the rattle of a helicopter. All 3 panicked and the girls held on tight, to the strap holding the egg box, as Marahoo dove*****. Indy's pilot (it was of course Indy) couldn't keep up. At last the helicopter disappeared across the Baltic Sea. The relief was great and Marahoo did a few extra flaps of glee.

But back by Marahoo's cave the Indy and the police were waiting. And Marahoo snuck up on them from behind, slowly - then she rushed up and bit their heads off. Happily smacking she ate them, while two equally happy girls put the eggs back into the nest. Now all problems were solved.

Or so they thought. The next day, a police officer came and wondered if they had seen his colleagues.

- No, Millan said. People hardly ever walk here, because there are no paths.
- Oh, said the police officer. Then I'll have to do it the hard way from the start. You're said to have a valuable bird here, according to Harrison Ford. And don't try to deny it.
- Yeah, maybe, said Elin calmly and fetched Marahoo.
- If you say ONE word about her, she might use these, said Millan and knocked on Marahoo's big sharp claws. Besides, no one can catch her. She can go anywhere she wants, so high that no one can see her. To Antarctica, north Africa, Canada, Russia or Australia. Or Iceland. Give up your search, please.

The officer sighed. Then he left.

Officer Hansen tore open the door of the police commissioner's office. The commissioner was sitting in there with coffee and a coconut pastry******.

- Excuse me, but... I've found the bird. It's huge! But it would be a shame to kill it. Can't we...
- HELL NO! DON'T YOU REALISE HOW DAMN MUCH MONEY THERE IS IN DOWN, MEAT, TALONS... EVERYTHING WILL BE FUCKING USED. NO SENTIMENTAL COSSETTING*******!!!
- Listen to me for a bit. There are three eggs in the nest. Get it!
- Eggs? Eggs, you say?! We have to raise the chicks and start a farm! Think of all the money!

The commissioner's mouth watered at the thought of the future and all the omelettes with tender slices of eagle meat. After filling his belly he could contently fall asleep on an eagle skin pillow stuffed with golden down.

- They've got horses there, officer Hansen said suddenly. Two ponies.
- To hell with them! screamed the commissioner cheerily. Let's go.

When they got there, Elin and Millan were saddling up Mara and Blackie. Luckily Marahoo had hidden herself and the eggs. Taken a private flight to the mountains, so to speak.

- Hrm, the commissioner started. Out with the bird!!
- Oh, that! Elin said. It's right there!

She pointed at a magpie that had just settled down in a juniper bush.

- Actually I meant the giant eagle! the commissioner snarled.

Elin turned away and unnoticably pulled a small onion from her pocket. She poked a hole in it with her fingernail and rubbed some juice under her eyes and sniffled. Then she said sadly:

- She's dead.. she flew away to look for food... but... then we heard a shot... and a scream... when we got there, she was already dead... and then a man came and picked up the eggs...
- Are we supposed to believe that? the commissioner wondered. But then he changed his mind. Both the little lassies were weeping so heart-wrenchingly...

- We should have understood that, he said. Then he left.

The next day, Marahoo came back.

MARAHOO WAS FREE!!!!

******************************

*Fucking awesome giant eagle and my main obsession from that Rescuers Down Under movie.
**Ey, cool word.
***Whoopsiedaisy!
****Not so windless all of a sudden!
*****Eagle not dove, dumbass.
******Disgusting.
*******I had never seen this word in me life.

Ratexla's 6 Nine Inch Nails lists

Updated at appropriate times.

The Nine Inch Nails songs I listen to the most...

From Pretty hate machine:
+Head like a hole (The first I heard of it was a wee piece, but I thought I'd like it!)
+Down in it
+Sanctified (Church vibes... leading to The-Great-Hall-from-Harry-Potter vibes... come sit by the fire, Severus.)
+Something I can never have (If I can ever be arsed to make an Alan Rickman Soundtrack version 2.0, this is so going onto it. A song for Severus.)

From Broken:
+Last (*punches the dry mud*)
+Happiness in slavery (The way I let my amusing obsessions enslave me?)
+Physical (Track #98. Yes.)

From The downward spiral:
+Closer (...)
+Big man with a gun (Mostly for lyrics. No, I now really like the whole thing.)
+A warm place
+The downward spiral (Mostly for lyrics. Solutions...)
+Hurt (Beautiful, esp the whispered parts... and others... and, on a side note, the kingfisher in the video, I almost went Christian from all the symbolism in those 3 s. :O )

From The fragile:
+Somewhat damaged
+The wretched
+We're in this together (Must... never... drive... while listening... to... this song... argh - )
+Even deeper
+The great below (One of my deathbed songs. And lullabies, in the meantime.)
+Into the void (But the best part is the video. Ewww, humans...)
+Where is everybody?
+Please
+Starfuckers, Inc.
+I'm looking forward to joining you, finally

From Still:
+Something I can never have (Combines the Desperate Voice and the 21st Century Voice... (see below.)
+The becoming (Def better than the original, whose background screams gives me visions of fleshy pale humans piled up in hell. Think I got it from some medieval painting in some history book. And that is not the music video of my choice. As it happens.)
+The day the world went away (A still blue shiny ocean on a July morning, it beats the original, and I could make a list of all the pwetty things in that video... Here are some of them for now: warm saturated colours, feather, flowers, fine sand, Trent, little black grains, black snake, yellow crystal.)
+And all that could have been
+Leaving hope

From With teeth:
+All the love in the world
+The hand that feeds (The intro subtly comes pounding up from some rebel basement, then the new badass Political!Trent jumps out at you!)
+Love is not enough
+Only (My first Nine Inch Nails song, at least the refrain stuck... 2 years later I remembered the song as "pretty good & sexy"! It turned out I had remembered it partly wrong, but whattehell!)
+Getting smaller
+Beside you in time (The pounding is half the torture! Nah. I started to like this after I saw the trailer for the Beside you in time DVD, which I suppose I will get some time. Lovely elegant magical animalistic sweaty dreamy LIVE NINE INCH NAILS TRAILER. :D )
+Right where it belongs (Good all the way, but when his voice suddenly becomes un-distorted and the crowd cheers... *bristle*)

From Year zero:
+Hyperpower! (The sound of a certain invaded concert? My death of choice. If their aim is true, at least.)
+The beginning of the end (And almost the beginning of the lovely lovely Year zero. I remember when I first put it on...)
+Survivalism (My buddy the Nine Inch Nails-sceptic likes this! :B )
+Me, I'm not (I didn't think much of it at first, but heard it in a new... light in the background of a Trent interview.)
+Capital G (Mostly for lyrics. TrentRez4Prez.)
+The warning (Mostly for lyrics. THE PRESENCE FOR PRESIDENT! *hands the presence a piece of organic hemp cloth*)
+Another version of the truth (Nice lullaby. I just like to listen to and envision each beat. Hypnosis? :9 The first part sounds tense, perhaps building up to... to a nuke explosion! Which of course fucks up the microphone placed next to it, so only a soft noise fades into the second part, my fave. Its... temperature varies. Like the warm air rising now and then from a bus radiator. The warmth is spindly, but at least your frozen fingers cheer (the finger-cheering way) each time it hits them.) But anyway - what would the title have to to with my initial mental video? Anotherversionofthetruth.com shows a peaceful field with some worrying text. If you scrape the picture with your cursor it reveals one of a degraded industrial wasteland. Because... the cute dream came true for a time, and for a chosen few, but since it is presently carried out in an unsustainable manner, the ruined scene beneath is just as true, for others, or will be for all, if not enough is done to prevent it. Both pictures are "brought to you by the US Bureau of Morality". They can create the fleeting dream and the resulting nightmare.)
+In this twilight (Love at first hearing. Our last day.)
+Zero-sum (Love at first hearing. The last song in the history of human civilisation. And there is whispering...)

From Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D:
+The great destroyer remixed by Modwheelmood (Faceslap to me: I, the remix-hater, tossed the CD in the player, listened with interest to the first track because at least that was Saul and one of my fave original tracks - then The great destroyer came on and I found myself grinning fool-happily during the first listen... Oh, a remix that doesn't go BLIP BLIP BLIP and requires dancing. Slow and kind of acoustic. Sadder! I'm not crazy about the original, though I like the lyrics (well, what I imagine they're about... which may be several things...) - now it's perfect. Nearly - where did "the limitless potential" go?)
+Another version of the truth remixed by Kronos & Enrique Gonzalez Müller (I find this as enjoyable as the original version. Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, the sound of Godzilla - or some more normal animal - thirsting to death on the Scorched Earth, squeak-squeak-squeak, a bit of a collapse. That second post-apocalyptic part sounds quite HAPPY and could almost pass for a Jane Austen movie soundtrack. If the Austen movie in question were to feature some ivy-covered factory chimneys in the background, aye.)
+In this twilight remixed by Fennesz (Also just as lovely as the original, but this too sounds... happier and (even?) more hopeful. Whaz that swishing overhead - nuclear missiles, mayhap? Siiiiiiinging in the missile rain... You know, that is very interesting, because I heard that most species are much more radiation tolerant than humans. :B Anyway. The final note fades out almost forever, like a supernova sending Trentdust all over the universe, where eventually it may nourish another biosphere. SNIFFLE.)

From Ghosts I-IV:
+3 Ghosts I (Perfect I.)
+12 Ghosts II (Illegal elephant products and rainforest wood Some fearless piano and a ghostly whisp of noise lived ran together in perfect harmony, like a little velvetty grey Arabian horse suddenly being joined by a rockin' Friesian on its morning sand jog. Yes, I did recently watch The young black stallion clips on Youtube. Cuz I never heard of that movie getting released. :p )
+13 Ghosts II (Ever since, after about 2 whole listens, I had it pointed out to me by Meathead and some fangirl that it contains BREATHING. A breathing ghost. *crankup*)
+14 Ghosts II (Perfect II. It reminds me a little of the scene in Gladiator where the cam spins around Team Maximus et Juba in Zucchabar, for they are caught in an upward (or should that be downward?) spiral (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) of success, fame, insanity, adrenaline, arse-sand and groupie-counts! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Then there is that euphoric, drunkedly dancing, howling guitar on TOP of the perfection!)
+20 Ghosts III (Random guitar comes floating into the soundscape. Like a ghost. Or a Dementor.)
+24 Ghosts III (I agree with Meathead. 80's car chase.)
+32 Ghosts IV (The first perfect Ghost to haunt my fave list. Flustering! Kind of porny! However, Meathead's sharing his vision of another 80's car chase cooled me off a little. Fuck.)

Miscellaneous:
+Suck (Some drum 'n' bass version of this Pigface cover.)
+Burn (From the Natural born killers soundtrack. I remember like 1 fragment of that movie... but I like it already. Again. *weep* Fuck. *dab* I tend to listen to this, among others, after, er, heated discussions about -)
+Dead souls (Joy Division cover from the soundtrack of The crow. I have it on CD, but this live version from the Reading Festival in 2007 is even... even...)
+Past the mission (With Tori Amos. *slrrrrp* Orange chocolate. Can I get the multitracks though plzthnx, I can barely hear Trent. Still, my heart vibrates with the frequency of his voice. Btw, I've now checked out 3 Tori albums and my mum likes her too.)
+Falling (Quake track without official title.)
+(Intro) Whisper (Outro) (Quake track without official title.)
+Pulse (Quake track without official title.)
+First born (Quake track without official title.)
+Driver down (From the Lost highway soundtrack. Hmm, on my unofficial compilation CD it's called Drive her down, which is implied to be a reference to...)
+Metal (Gary Numan cover. Love at first hearing due to much sexiness.)
+Deep (From the Tomb raider soundtrack. I don't claim to like it only because everyone hates it.)
+Non-entity
+Flyentology (With El-P. Ahhh! The Desperate Voice... but not enough of it...)
+Break (With Saul Williams. There's some Trent voice in it somewhere...)
+WTF! (With Saul Williams.)

-------------------------------------

My mum's favourite Nine Inch Nails songs... Why yes, I enjoy making lists.

+Terrible lie
+And all that could have been
+Leaving hope
+Only ("This one's good too! A few songs are difficult but other than that they're pretty good! One gets used to it! You have INDOCTRINATED me! I let it get under my skin... I let you pump it through my - veinssssahhhhhhhhh...")
+Right where it belongs
+Zero-sum

-------------------------------------

Works to which Year zero gives me more or less intense flashbacks...

Books:
+Collapse by Jared Diamond (He, however, claims we are NOT doomed from the start. *looks from jared to trent as if at some tennis game* Then I found this title among the Year zero banned media and died of happiness. But not of surprise... Btw: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is also among the banned media. That killed me again. TRENT - ?! :D Oh, wonderful banned media... in general. *extends must-read list* And - the Year zero sites are visible to us because the Solutions Backwards Initiative group sent them back through time? :) Hence the distorted look of them? Ahhhhhhhhh.)
+On the beach by Nevil Shute (Soy milkshake, check. Zero-sum, check. Cyanide pill, check. Euthanised pets, check. The sand is cooling.)
+Lady Chatterley's lover by D.H. Lawrence (I haven't got any English edition in my possession, but something the lover says about... what calms him...)
+The stand by Stephen King (Bloody repopulation. Anyway, I heard that fragments of it are visible on one of the Year zero sites...! Hmm, can't find it on the Banned media page... No matter.)

Films:
+Children of men ('Twas the chimneys. Bloody repopulation again.)
+E.T. (Environmentalist from space, kind of like the Presence. If the latter is an alien.)
+Soldier (Post-apocalyptic society on a garbage planet. I believe it is called kitchen sink realism.)
+The wild blue yonder (I could just go ahead and officially proclaim its ending my favouritest ever ever.)
+Terminator 1 (Love. And dogs. Love.)
+Terminator 2 (This film is so perfect that I haven't even got the DVD. I mentioned the Terminator movies in the review I had to write for On the beach.)
+Terminator 3

---------------------------

Supposedly Year zero-related books I have not read...

+Oh, PROOOOOOOOBABLY 1984, by George Orwell
+They thought they were free by Milton Mayer (Trent mentioned it in a certain interview, could be useful reading...)
+Swan song by Robert McCammon (Recommended in a Nine Inch Nails blog comment. "It's about life after nuclear war, but it's like Stephen King meets....I don't know. Weird stuff, and not like real life, but interesting just the same.")
+Left behind: A novel of the Earth's last days by Tim F. LaHaye (Recommended in a Nine Inch Nails blog comment... "...basically the Book of Revelation set to fictional characters, all that YZ encompasses is right there."
+The road by Cormac McCarthy (Recommended in a Nine Inch Nails blog comment! :O "...a post-apocalyptic story about a father and son crossing America after a nuclear war.")

I want to eat you, books.

---------------------------

Some shit to love about Trent/Nine Inch Nails...

Random:
+His ad against fur
+My x favourite songs
+His Artistic Integrity... even while he was still on a record label
+The Presence
+His dogs
+The Year zero-related artwork
+His treatment of fans on a small scale (judging by what Everybody reports)
+His treatment of fans on a large scale
+The Ghosts video contest which resulted in many a violent clash between battling, camera-slinging fans film festival... Yeah, I AM gonna get my filming off the ground. Soon.
+His new method of music distribution
+The range between emotions and between eras expressed in the songs (Range also happens to be one of the things I appreciate most in... actors... In this case, I love trying and failing to believe that it's the same bloke performing March of the pigs and Another version of the truth, or blooper-giggling on MTV. Or it could all just be my a) people-prejudices b) prosopagnosia. He seems so sincere, and (as someone pointed out) does not appear to be slaving under some stereotypical image of himself but will curse and giggle as he pleases. :9 Aye, it's fun to shock people.)
+His unwillingness to discuss lyrics (Me and poetry... :p I was getting a bit nervous about interpreting things the wrong way because doing so will cause hairy palms and lightning strikes... when I could guess at any meaning at all, that is. After I had heard him say what he said, the lyrics entered a less solid state and trickled into every corner of the unit known as Yoze, working as a key that would more often than before find a fit. Thanks for your blessing, dahling. :B )
+His ability to get off drugs
+His ability to get off record labels
+His sense of humour
+His blog
+His cursing

Vocals:
+His whispering voice
+His singing voice
+His 21st century voice
+His desperate voice
+His speaking voice (Bloody 'ell. I hereby declare that Trent has my favourite voice of all non-Brits. "...fucked us", "Charles, that is", "...while you're hiding in the trees", "...that you're the reason..." *lobotomises self with ice pick in order to block all other distracting sensory perceptions*)

Year zero sites:
+The Mailstrom with keys
+Grace the Teacher
+The Hour of Arrival
+Operation Swamp 0000
+The popup message from Consolidated Mail Systems
+The Situational Anxiety Disorder Quiz
+The Price of Treason
+Hollywood in Memoriam
+The Viability index

Yoze is visually oriented a shallow bitch:
+His eyes
+His 2005 hair
+His height
+His ~2000 eyeliner
+His nose
+His 1994 hair
+His name
+His eyebrows

-----------------------------

Oh, to have been there for the release of...

...Pretty hate machine back in 1989!
The first Nine Inch Nails album! My age of 6 at the time should not have hindered me, ffs, seeing how my taste for rock was founded no later than 1990 or so (when I got my first real record and attended my first concert - double-thank you, Gianna Nannini). I wonder if I heard any Nine Inch Nails hit on the radio in 1989? What if I had noticed it, and liked it, and - and - uh...

...The downward spiral back in 1994!
The most famous Nine Inch Nails album, I suppose. The breakthrough? So I wouldn't have been able to say "I was among the first 4 people to discover Nine Inch Nails" - something I still cannot say, ACTUALLY. I also would have been subjected to 1 cancelled Swedish concert and 1 decade of waiting for Nine Inch Nails to return here, but at least I would have had the live experience by now. (TIMES 2 OR SUMMAT!) And the ability to brag about my decade of fan-suffering. (Speaking of suffering, think I had my first suicidal thoughts in 1994. Hmmmmmmmmmmm. On the other hand, my English sucked. Harder.)

...The fragile back in 1999!
The most anticipated album of the 90's? The one that would Save Rock? :)

...With teeth back in 2005!
Trent survived, Trent got clean and Trent made another album. That would kind of have been cause for celebration. As would said album's rockiness.

...Year zero back in the thickening fogs of April 2007!
My favourite Nine Inch Nails album and its wicked, mysterious, confusing surrounding art project!

...Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D back in - oh dear!
The record shop said they expected to get it on November 28, 2007. I stomped in there around noon and they had not unpacked it yet. Mrrrrr. Shouldn't someone have grown tired of tossing and turning, unlocked the shop around 3am and unpacked a few CD:s before opening time? :p They need me.

...Ghosts I-IV back on March 2, 2008!
Only ~19 years late, wee I shall knowingly witness the release of a completely new Nine Inch Nails album. According to the stats, it will contain something fucking marvellous. Actually I still missed this release by 4 hours. BLADDY 'ELL! It happened just like this:
December!Trent: *posts cosy mysterious studio photos at nin.com*
Trent on February 7: "We have been very busy doing secret things. We’ll start to tell you about them soon."
Trent on February 16: "2 weeks"
Ratexla: *freerides on others' calculations that this means march 1*
March 1: *arrives quietly*
Ratexla: "Dare I go to the sci-fi con today? In case NIN.com gets updated? Btw, no, fuck the sci-fi con, I'll go tomorrow... but now I got all geared up to go, so I'll just check out the record shop for a bit."
Trent on March 1: "Soon..."
Ratexla: *returns home to find above post*
Ratexla: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
Ratexla: *recalls meathead's recurring definition of trent's definition of "soon"*
Ratexla: "Just in case something really will happen on March 1, I'll spend half the night in front of NIN.com, commenting and reloading. Because I cannot wait to see what will happen, and I don't want to look like a shitty fan with a fucking life."
NIN.com: "Soon..."
NIN.com: "Soon..."
NIN.com: "Soon..."
Ratexla: "It's the perfect time for me to distribute those 150 Animal Rights Sweden pamphlets tonight though. Trent would understand. [Tough shit if he wouldn't.]"
NIN.com: "Soon..."
NIN.com: "Soon..."
Fellow blog commentator: "If he really posted that from Hong Kong, he's probably asleep right now."
Ratexla: "Good point. I will sleep until it's morning in Hong Kong. Or even a few hours more, so I can stay up tomorrow morning... and reload."
Ratexla: "SNORE."
Ratexla's paper gnome phone: *BEEP*
NIN.com: "Soon..."
Ratexla: *gets around the paper district abnormally quickly*
NIN.com: "Soon..."
March 2: *is*
Ratexla: "Hey, I'm going to the sci-fi con... If you're gonna be surfing anyway, could you check NIN.com every now and then and call me if it's updated?"
Folks: "WTF?! YOU ARE TAKING THIS TOO FAR!"
Ratexla: *stalks sci-fi stars (but first, makes another shocking discovery)*
NIN.com: "Soon..."
NIN.com: "Soon..."
Ratexla: "Yawn. Well, it's no longer March 1 anywhere, not in Hong Kong, not in LA... So... whatever will happen may happen at any time during the next few weeks now, eh? Sweet, I can go to bed."
Ratexla: "SNORE."
Trent: "Tick tock... Tick tock..."
Ratexla: "SNORE."
Trent: "2 hours"
Ratexla: "SNORE." :)
Ratexla: *dreams about tori amos and trent, fyi*
Ratexla: *cruelly kicks computer into action*
Trent: "Ghosts I-IV - The new Nine Inch Nails record is available RIGHT NOW."
Ratexla: *blink*

...ah, fuck it! Option 30's album, of which I hear there are 1000 copies!
I'm looking, I'm looking... :)

Ratexla's poetry 1998-2007

Yeah, well... YOU'RE UGLY!!!!!!!!!!11

Maple signs
A maple leaf fell on me
I took it as a sign

I woke up in a pile of maple leaves
and took it as a sign

A huge maple tree fell over me
and crushed me

I died happy

Eating on air
I turned my TV on
There was a program about cannibals

I switched the channel
to see a snake eat a rat

And then I watched a scene in Patient X
You and some bitch were in it, btw

Illogic
1 planet
2 languages
1 ratgirl
21 years
2 continents
1 ratboy
0 common sense

Love

More, more!
If I say I'd like to see more of you
It might very well mean
that you should be more on that TV show

But it most likely means
that you just should be in some bed
where I wanna see more of you :-P~

Pain
I've been in such pain all day
and it doesn't seem to go away
(rhyme! hihi??)

First of all I woke up with Da Pains
and realized that if I met you
we wouldn't be able to do it

And my sore throat made me understand
that if I saw you
but you didn't see me
there would be no way of making myself heard

But the worst pain was in my soul
as I thought of the fact that I would
never meet you or even see you
Never see you and absolutely never meet you
anyway

Wrong guy
You're 7500 kilometers away
Before I existed you'd had a million girlfriends
Your lover is a model
50000 women worldwide want you badly

So what!

Only
We're only 8000 kilometers
9 hours
21 years apart

As a dreamer I like the word "only"

Anger
In the morning I got in a bad mood
Because someone did force me out of bed too early

At school I got mad
Because my teacher was a bitch

I wasn't expecting to get murderous
as I went to bed

But you weren't there

Fall
I hate fall
Everything's dark
Cold rain

Was what I wrote 2 years ago

Last fall
You came to me

I wrote
I love fall
The red maple leaves make my world a better place
The dark is good to hide in
And we get to fuck in peace

This fall
You're leaving

I repeat:
I hate fall...

Requirements
If I ever wanted to know the color of your eyes
I'd have to
stand close to you
put my arms around you
feel your body close to mine
and maybe make you lie down
so that I could see your eyes

Too bad! :-P~

Hot
I went out naked in the rain
and thought of a city
and of someone there

Didn't freeze.

Death
In case a nuclear bomb would kill me
In the middle of the night
It’d be nice if you knew
You'd been the last person I thought of

T.T.I.O.T.
When the sun is blocked by the powerful
and the spotlights are blinding

I want you to know
Down there in the darkness
The truth is resting

Real thing
Listening to one
Looking at another
Talking ’bout the third

While thinking of you
And following your dreams

Curses
Damn this
Fuck that
To hell with him

Bless you

Blind SOAB
I want you to see me

I’m the rat in the hole in your wall
The cop behind the magic mirror
I’m your guardian angel

And I want you to see me

Invisibility
So I see
I’m invisible, right?

I’m pretty good at
sitting in front of you
looking sad
asking quietly for attention
without you noticing

Well then I guess I could just as well
call you morons
shoot your grandmas
and burn to death
without you noticing

RIP?
When you die
Don’t RIP

I’ll be there
Snoring by your side

Tagging
I *heart* Nick
Nick rules
YS + NL = True

My love was a crime
that made the cops get me

Catboy
Like the tiger you are
Like a wild cat
You came

I wanted you to be mine
Like the wild cat you are
You belong to no one

I loved you
Like the wild cat you are
You never loved anyone

You began to walk away
Like the wild cat you are
Your life will never change

My life changed;
I died
Who the hell can live
without a heart?

Mini-saga about vacation of some kind
The poor high school class
had to go to a
really boring kind of place.

One courageously broke out and
fled west on a stolen
Arabian thoroughbred.

LA glistened under the setting
sun.

Natasha became a big movie
director and her old enemies
choked on their sour beer
back home.

Mini-saga: The last day
On the last day I
went and told the evils
to kiss my flowery ass.
They tried to catch and
kill me, only to discover
- the following second - that I
was already on the next
plane to Out There. I
laughed and waved all the
way to the Bermuda Triangle.

Change of heart
There were lots of those loves first
Only one was to last
I expected a burst
but I’d learned from the past

After three years’ obsession
my whole world lay on thee
a secret possession
and a mission for me

I felt too safe to care
when I cared about him
My heart lay all bare
when the bolt made me dim

Smell of blood
Our seagulls party hard as hell
Some fishers reach the shore
The teachers find no soul to bore
In June life CAN be swell

As temps race up into the sun
I leave the movies’ night
I’m one of few within the light
Where freedom lets you run

Along the river roars the bus
I scream, ”Speed up, speed up!”
Can’t wait to get there, to THE TOP
I’ll get him, just because

Two green eyes flash when I walk in
They light up Goblin’s Hat
A crazy gaze, acknowledge that
I yell, ”You’re mine, Joaquin!”

River watching
By the darkening river
his brotherly talk gives in
His tongue moves on to wilder grounds, her skin
Cool fluid makes her shiver

With flesh like red hot Inca gold
he makes her rich, he should be told
She turns away her aching eyes
to spot the dove, it greets them twice

Through jungle, across glowing desert rocks
she clings to him, a mass of raven locks
A long fall into a emerald mine
She’s broken, dies smiling in their starry shine

Rise and shine
With him in the straw
and the sound of a river
a kitten’s soft paw
and the trash packed with liver

They watch from the outside
The cat’s now a cheetah
Their souls rush on worldwide
But he slows down to meet her

The memory’s bitter
Yet sweet as his kisses
It’s the lightning that hit her,
the dreamworld, she misses

The rules
In the gold of the sun
or the milk of the moon
Whenever I meet him
I will act like a loon

In the skin of a lamb
and my guts filled with bird
A single mistake
and he won’t say a word

I will mention my bro
while we stare at the river
He will throw up the tofu
and scream, ”You’re chopped liver!”

If the list of these rules
fly right out of my pocket
He won’t think it’s sweet
Only flee like a rocket

Trapalanda
The stable door closes,
a new gate will open.
He staggers behind her
to the shape in the shade.
She embraces his neck, it’s thin,
and weeps in his mane, it’s gone tangled.
She takes off his halter
and he takes the last leap.
He hears the sound of his hooves on new grass,
not the gun shot.
He sees the sun rise, and the dew.
She sees it set.
He can feel clear water fill his belly,
the cooling she feels is his blood.
The final sigh in her face
becomes his first song through morning mist.

Trapalanda (in Swedish, what harm can it do)
Stalldörren stängs,
en ny port ska öppnas.
Han stapplar bakom henne
till gestalten i skuggan.
Hon kramar hans hals, den är tunn
och gråter i hans man, full av tovor.
Hon tar av honom grimman
och han tar det sista språnget.
Han hör sina hovar mot nytt gräs,
inte skottet.
Han ser solen stiga, och daggen.
Hon ser den sjunka.
Han kan känna klart vatten fylla honom.
Kylan hon känner är blod.
Den sista sucken i hennes ansikte
blir hans första sång genom morgondis.

Jacob
The thunder last night was hard
but I greet you and forget it.
You tell me you’re sorry
for making the decision for me
for asking me to leave
and to sleep.
You can’t feel my pain.
All I do is hope
that you’ll let me sink in peace,
to the darkness beneath the surface.
Hot tears hit my nose,
shaky hands stroke my face,
I cradle in soft arms and listen.
We will take a walk,
go to bed,
meet my friends.
Your voice blends into my dream
until there’s no more dream.
I’m suddenly there.

Jacob (Swedish version)
Åskan i natt var svår
men jag kysser dig och glömmer.
Du ber om förlåtelse
för beslutet du fattar åt mig
för att du ber mig gå
och ber mig sova.
Du kan inte känna min plåga som jag.
Allt jag gör är hoppas
att du låter mig sjunka ner i ron,
till mörkret under ytan.
Heta tårar träffar min nos,
darrande händer stryker mitt ansikte,
jag vilar i mjuka armar och lyssnar.
Vi ska ut och vandra,
vila tillsammans,
möta mina vänner.
Din röst flyter samman med min dröm
tills drömmen upphör och blir verklig.
Jag är där till sist.

Mitochondria (in the spirit of possibly computer-generated song lyrics. Really.)
What would I do without you
When I’m tired, you get me through
You’re always there for me
As if I’m greater than the sea

You keep me good and warm
I could never do you any harm
For as long as the sun will shine
I know you will be mine

You give me so much power
And live in every bird and flower
You keep me from dying
For you I will always keep trying

Spoonman
I'll cut your heart out with a spoon, he promised
And like all the other times in his life when he did something right
He kept his promise.
Only the spoon was too sharp
Too pure
Too flawless
For her to feel.
Used with such skill
She didn't stir once
Until many years later
When she due to lucky chance
Had the spoon pointed out to her.
She stared in disbelief
Her eyes rolled back
Her tongue rolled out
The DVD shop owner's brand new convertible rolled on.
And he only smirked with the spoon and her heart
In his hands
Hiding one face or a hundred of his
And did his job as he had done all along.
At petrol stations
In misty dungeons
On the cloud next to God
Carrying people through the silver rain underneath
That slithered through her brain.

Moonworm
I stand on the shore
tasting the wind for grass and smoke
A sallow moon rises to ripple in black
Less brilliant than that by which I was blinded
two nights past the vagabond desert star
No brighter than those moons I’m waiting to see
Two twin moons covered in unthirsty violets
Hiding now behind the rim of my world

Daisy
I run to the end of the world
To the daisy meadow
I claw at the daisies in the meadow
And I stretch my aching flesh amongst the daisies
And roll around in the daisy meadow
Begging for daisies to sully my clothes
Eating some daisies with raging delight
The heat wants my death by sunshine
between proud stiff daisy stems
Still daisies fill my senses and my little daisy vase
Not until night do my tears water salty shrivelled daisies

Their god
Said to possess that bush-burning power
He looks over all the cubicle walls
Calls attentions
And they lean into his extended arm
That points out all around
What he shows them
Panoramic essences of truth and decay
At whose end the bush is burning
Having brought about its own ignition

Heroin sweet
I imagine pure and infinite love. Love
that is every particle in the universe and
fills each of one’s love receptors. Each. The
universe holds no vacuum, for
it has become a black hole of love. Still
it retains its size, is blinding, and
lets one touch every corner. You
are expanding with love, the
universe with you. Only
this love has value. Love
intense as a panic attack, agony, exploding
heart, suffocation, spinning
head, vertigo, ascending
human body, scream. Love
that says yes to snot, shit,
puke, piss, saliva, mucus. The love
gazes smilingly at pain, disease,
mutilation, noise, depression,
poverty, collapse, addiction and
untimely death.

Erosion
The brain's pearly rough surface and
the lion's scraping tongue have
torn asunder a spot of my
skin, showing raw red meat and white
bones beneath. His shell is long
removed, the distance between our
ulcers only glassy screens. It will one
day, many nights, cease to be. Our
bloods are exchanged as one cares for
the other, trust for trust. Closeness
in thoughts and time until space is
traversed and he gives us everything.

Group hug!
All is a stormy vortex of black
sand circling, through dark yellow dying
light, a glistening man, our
final sight, one last shore to
grasp in lingering human hands. Our
blood went. What we once sucked for
life died. Now only the wait for
a winter remains. We
shall fade and not know the
next explosion as light for a
time returns. Eyes
close from what we never wanted to
see coming. Arms feel him solid in our
grip still. Against
walls of hearts beat echoes firing the
battles we went down fighting. Pulses
slow while we wait, nay, rest with
him, hearing, feeling, inhaling
scents and sharing unseen
kisses of sweat and pearl gray and
lips now smoky.

Ratexla's unprofessional & not very annual Oscar... non-bets

Con commentz. Carin may herewith consider her wish for a certain review granted (it deals mainly with pants and slaughter videos).

Best Motion Picture of the Year
-Atonement (2007): Tim Bevan, Eric Fellner, Paul Webster
-Juno (2007): Lianne Halfon, Mason Novick, Russell Smith
-Michael Clayton (2007): Sydney Pollack, Jennifer Fox, Kerry Orent
-No Country for Old Men (2007): Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, Scott Rudin
-There Will Be Blood (2007): Paul Thomas Anderson, Daniel Lupi, JoAnne Sellar

+This is starting out well as I HAVEN'T SEEN ANY OF THE FILMS IN THE MOST "IMPORTANT" CATEGORY. That means they have nominated the wrong movies. However, I read about There will be blood yesterday and, uh, it's about oil and stuff, in the olde days. Still it reminds me of Nine Inch Nails' newer work. :D

Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role
-George Clooney for Michael Clayton (2007)
-Daniel Day-Lewis for There Will Be Blood (2007)
-Johnny Depp for Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)
-Tommy Lee Jones for In the Valley of Elah (2007)
-Viggo Mortensen for Eastern Promises (2007)

+Cuz Johnny was working with Alan & Sacha... Well, nothing wrong with Johnny either. I'm surprised I'm not obsessed with him. Aaaaaaaaaand I HAVE seen Sweeney Todd! Flashback to Earthlings.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role
-Cate Blanchett for Elizabeth: The Golden Age (2007)
-Julie Christie for Away from Her (2006)
-Marion Cotillard for Môme, La (2007)
-Laura Linney for The Savages (2007)
-Ellen Page for Juno (2007)

+Cate is my fave among these! Elizabeth I II is on my gonna-see list, even though I didn't get shit of the first one. *bites into another flax seed*

Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role
-Casey Affleck for The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (2007)
-Javier Bardem for No Country for Old Men (2007)
-Philip Seymour Hoffman for Charlie Wilson's War (2007)
-Hal Holbrook for Into the Wild (2007)
-Tom Wilkinson for Michael Clayton (2007)

+Um, yeah, Into the wild is on my will-see list. I just gotta read the book first. After I've read 64 other books. I heard that it's about/for the kind of people who have read too much Jack London (my fave piece of fiction is THE CALL OF THE WILD!) and Henry Thoreau (my fave piece of non-fiction is THE FUTURE OF LIFE, WHICH CONTAINS A CHAPTER ABOUT THOREAU! I also wanna read Thoreau's book about civil disobedience. Dunnask. :D ). The background story sounds like something I would have liked to do when I was 12 and suicidal...er. Who is Hal Holbrook? This was a tough choice since Casey Affleck is rumoured to be best buddies with my fave piece of mankind, JOAQUIN PHOENIX!

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role
-Cate Blanchett for I'm Not There. (2007)
-Ruby Dee for American Gangster (2007)
-Saoirse Ronan for Atonement (2007)
-Amy Ryan for Gone Baby Gone (2007)
-Tilda Swinton for Michael Clayton (2007)

+Fuck it, let's get Cate another one.

Best Achievement in Directing
-Paul Thomas Anderson for There Will Be Blood (2007)
-Ethan Coen, Joel Coen for No Country for Old Men (2007)
-Tony Gilroy for Michael Clayton (2007)
-Jason Reitman for Juno (2007)
-Julian Schnabel for Scaphandre et le papillon, Le (2007)

+The one I'd most like to see in this category cuz... I've briefly attempted to imagine such a life.

Best Writing, Screenplay Written Directly for the Screen
-Juno (2007): Diablo Cody
-Lars and the Real Girl (2007): Nancy Oliver
-Michael Clayton (2007): Tony Gilroy
-Ratatouille (2007): Brad Bird, Jan Pinkava, Jim Capobianco
-The Savages (2007): Tamara Jenkins

+I have seen a few minutes of Ratatouille... (In Swedish, alas.) Rats rule. The Juno trailer actually sounded terribly promising, but seeing how it's from the anti-death lobby... (Yeah yeah yeah, I know it officially ISN'T... *puts recycled Al foil on head... or somewhere else*)

Best Writing, Screenplay Based on Material Previously Produced or Published
-Atonement (2007): Christopher Hampton
-Away from Her (2006): Sarah Polley
-Scaphandre et le papillon, Le (2007): Ronald Harwood
-No Country for Old Men (2007): Joel Coen, Ethan Coen
-There Will Be Blood (2007): Paul Thomas Anderson

+AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Again, seen none. The one that's supposedly from the pro-imagination lobby, then.

Best Achievement in Cinematography
-The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (2007): Roger Deakins
-Atonement (2007): Seamus McGarvey
-No Country for Old Men (2007): Roger Deakins
-Scaphandre et le papillon, Le (2007): Janusz Kaminski
-There Will Be Blood (2007): Robert Elswit

+I have seen... THE TRAILER! It could be good, right. Cinematography in one's head.

Best Achievement in Editing
-The Bourne Ultimatum (2007): Christopher Rouse
-Scaphandre et le papillon, Le (2007): Juliette Welfling
-Into the Wild (2007): Jay Cassidy
-No Country for Old Men (2007): Ethan Coen, Joel Coen
-There Will Be Blood (2007): Dylan Tichenor

+A London-Thoreau thingy can't not have BRILLIANT EDITING!

Best Achievement in Art Direction
-American Gangster (2007): Arthur Max, Beth A. Rubino
-Atonement (2007): Sarah Greenwood, Katie Spencer
-The Golden Compass (2007): Dennis Gassner, Anna Pinnock
-Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007): Dante Ferretti, Francesca Lo Schiavo
-There Will Be Blood (2007): Jack Fisk, Jim Erickson

+Mmmmmmmmmmhm, it had pretty nice art direction I guess... When does this list end, I'm relatively unobsessed with movies at the mo.

Best Achievement in Costume Design
-Across the Universe (2007): Albert Wolsky
-Atonement (2007): Jacqueline Durran
-Elizabeth: The Golden Age (2007): Alexandra Byrne
-Môme, La (2007): Marit Allen
-Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007): Colleen Atwood

+Alanpants... Sacha...pants or whatever... Johnnystripedbathingsuit... Thanx.

Best Achievement in Makeup
-Môme, La (2007): Didier Lavergne, Jan Archibald
-Norbit (2007): Rick Baker, Kazuhiro Tsuji
-Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007): Ve Neill, Martin Samuel

+The one with the bloke with eyeliner/eyeshadow/it's one of those/I should work in an evil bimbo makeup shop and fail to endorse animal-tested shit! Sooty-eyed blokes, though... See also: Sweeney Todd, Gladiator, Trent during the Fragile era.

Best Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures, Original Score
-Atonement (2007): Dario Marianelli
-The Kite Runner (2007): Alberto Iglesias
-Michael Clayton (2007): James Newton Howard
-Ratatouille (2007): Michael Giacchino
-3:10 to Yuma (2007): Marco Beltrami

+Didn't he do the Vertical limit soundtrack? Which was good.

Best Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures, Original Song
-August Rush (2007): Jamal Joseph, Charles Mack, Tevin Thomas ("Raise It Up")
-Enchanted (2007): Alan Menken, Stephen Schwartz ("Happy Working Song")
-Enchanted (2007): Alan Menken, Stephen Schwartz ("So Close")
-Enchanted (2007): Alan Menken, Stephen Schwartz ("That's How You Know")
-Once (2006): Glen Hansard, Markéta Irglová ("Falling Slowly")

+Happy working song sounds like shit (title-wise, I ain't heard it)... So close, however, sounds closer to Closer, the classic Nine Inch Nails tune we always used to sing during Kindergarten assembly... No, of course we didn't, for that was in the EIGHTIES, SILLY!

Best Achievement in Sound
-The Bourne Ultimatum (2007): Scott Millan, David Parker, Kirk Francis
-No Country for Old Men (2007): Skip Lievsay, Craig Berkey, Greg Orloff, Peter F. Kurland
-Ratatouille (2007): Randy Thom, Michael Semanick, Doc Kane
-3:10 to Yuma (2007): Paul Massey, David Giammarco, Jim Stuebe
-Transformers (2007): Kevin O'Connell, Greg P. Russell, Peter J. Devlin

+*SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK*

Best Achievement in Sound Editing
-The Bourne Ultimatum (2007): Karen M. Baker, Per Hallberg
-No Country for Old Men (2007): Skip Lievsay
-Ratatouille (2007): Randy Thom, Michael Silvers
-There Will Be Blood (2007): Matthew Wood
-Transformers (2007): Mike Hopkins, Ethan Van der Ryn

+Squeak.

Best Achievement in Visual Effects
-The Golden Compass (2007): Michael L. Fink, Bill Westenhofer, Ben Morris, Trevor Wood
-Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007): John Knoll, Hal T. Hickel, Charlie Gibson, John Frazier
-Transformers (2007): Scott Farrar, Scott Benza, Russell Earl, John Frazier

+Was it Compass that enchanted Carin so greatly, or was it Enchanted? I'll just take my chances with Compass. *shrug* Though Johnny Sparrow is visually tasty.

Best Animated Feature Film of the Year
-Persepolis (2007): Vincent Paronnaud, Marjane Satrapi
-Ratatouille (2007): Brad Bird
-Surf's Up (2007): Ash Brannon, Chris Buck

+I made a mental note to see Persepolis... I think... and if I could find it after it finished its 3-second run in local theatres. That is. Rats still rule, but they also don't need me support because they've got Disney now. There there.

Best Foreign Language Film of the Year
-Fälscher, Die (2007) (Austria)
-Beaufort (2007) (Israel)
-Mongol (2007) (Kazakhstan)
-Katyn (2007) (Poland)
-12 (2007) (Russia)

+Poor Borat-victimised Kazakhstan.

Best Documentary, Features
-No End in Sight (2007): Charles Ferguson, Audrey Marrs
-Operation Homecoming: Writing the Wartime Experience (2007): Richard Robbins
-Sicko (2007): Michael Moore, Meghan O'Hara
-Taxi to the Dark Side (2007): Alex Gibney, Eva Orner
-War Dance (2007): Andrea Nix, Sean Fine

+Only one I've heard of... And I do wanna see.

Best Documentary, Short Subjects
-Freeheld (2007): Cynthia Wade, Vanessa Roth
-Corona, La (2008): Amanda Micheli, Isabel Vega
-Salim Baba (2008): Tim Sternberg, Francisco Bello
-Sari's Mother (2006): James Longley

+... ... ... I'll just pick the oldest movie. Perhaps it's unfairly struggling if it needed 2 years to get recognition. If only the same attention would be given to some of my struggling faves. *weep*

Best Short Film, Animated
-Même les pigeons vont au paradis (2007): Samuel Tourneux, Vanesse Simon
-I Met the Walrus (2007): Josh Raskin
-Madame Tutli-Putli (2007): Chris Lavis, Maciek Szczerbowski
-Moya lyubov (2006): Aleksandr Petrov
-Peter & the Wolf (2006): Suzie Templeton, Hugh Welchman

+Someone among the NIN.com blog comments have been nagging about a walrus, which is my fully legitimate reason to, uh, place my bets on this movie.

Best Short Film, Live Action
-Om natten (2007): Christian E. Christiansen, Louise Vesth
-Supplente, Il (2006): Andrea Jublin
-Mozart des pickpockets, Le (2006): Philippe Pollet-Villard
-Tanghi argentini (2006): Guy Thys, Anja Daelemans
-The Tonto Woman (2007): Daniel Barber, Matthew Brown

+That's some Nordic title. Root root.

Facebook status...es? 2007

(Most of them, and not in perfect order. I wonder if I would blog more if I weren't spoiled by this lovely Facebook function?)

-Josefine is getting her werewolf wounds licked. By Remus.
-Josefine is in detention.
-Josefine is sleep-walking in the dungeons.
-Josefine is schoolbookless until tomorrow or summat.
-Josefine is curled up with a cuppa warm soy milk & a pile of school handouts.
-Josefine is in Facebook rehab.
-Josefine is on the run from Facebook rehab.
-Josefine is watching a wee bit of Blow dry.
-Josefine is surfing on her day off... OH NO!!!.
-Josefine is toying with her sleeping pattern.
-Josefine is PLAYING DANGEROUS GAMES with her sleeping pattern.
-Josefine is going to the cinema to see “Becoming Jane”.
-Josefine is reading.
-Josefine is blog-stalking Trent Reznor.
-Josefine is getting high on NIN.
-Josefine is reading Collapse.
-Josefine is recovering from a brutal dental exam. Cavity count: 0. EVER! XD
-Josefine is injecting vodka as anti-freeze.
-Josefine is pondering what to do with her freedom to punish bothersome online customers.
-Josefine is composing the ultimate veggieburger.
-Josefine is descending into NIN’s The Great Below.
-Josefine is having sinful, forbidden fantasies about surviving the spring semester.
-Josefine is drying up & calming the fuck down after her paper round.
-Josefine is walking the dawg.
-Josefine is ACTUALLY gonna read school PDF:s now, then watch “Elektra” just because of JASON ISAACS OMFG!!! XD
-Josefine is listening to sedative music.
-Josefine is staring at a 1983 photo of Trent.
-Josefine is ACADEMICALLY 99% FUCKED & once again able to describe her life entirely in NIN quotes.
-Josefine is off to some Johnny Cash church event called “Hurt” even though she technically doesn’t even listen to Cash. NIN gig surrogate, you see! XD
-Josefine is toying with her sleeping pattern.
-Josefine is zorry but the thought of having to rank her friends & the like gives her them heebiejeebies! :O :)
-Josefine is pointing & laughing evilly at NIN’s former record company.
-Josefine is a bad bad student, Severus sez.
-Josefine is only celebrating WORLD VEGAN DAY and legally downloading a HISTORICAL ALBUM. One she will possibly fucking hate. :D.
-Josefine is having a NIN-hiphop tea party. Aye. *COUGH* http://www.niggytardust.com/ *COUGH*.
-Josefine is googlin rainforest birds.
-Josefine is performing 4000 painkiller-free castrations on Swedish pig industry people daily. They like. It's cheap, too.
-Josefine is checking to see how many millions have joined the 1ºC group since yesterday *COUGH*.
-Josefine is getting high on green tea.
-Josefine is going to die a most gruesome death if they don't FIX THE FUCKING 6 DEGREES APPLICATION WITHIN 40 SECONDS!!!
-Josefine is almost studying.
-Josefine is fighting in the Battle of Tradera.
-Josefine is filling in blog-list #395723957.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D even though she is generally a remix-hater.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and reading ecotourism article #259275.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and is confused by the werewolf application. Oh well.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and über-daydreaming.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and dayumnear killing herself with http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tI_GkdPeHGE.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and drowning her school books in tea.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and uploading 4000000000 RANGER PHOTOS. :O.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and taking a nite shower.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and sadly Facebookin at school again.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D, Year Zero part II, a DVD, NIN, revolutions and death.
-Josefine is waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D and is gonna go paper-gnoming tonight, weeee.
-Josefine is no longer waiting for Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D. XD.
-Josefine is rilly getting the fuck off Facebook now.
-Josefine is ... reading?
-Josefine is licking nin.com.
-Josefine is smooching nin.com. And reading some school Powerpoints... glah...
-Josefine is smooching nin.com and looking at all the pwetty figures in the textbook.
-Josefine is awake?
-Josefine is wondering what nin.com sounds like today (RIP, speakers), and panicking over how much she will suck at tomorrow's exam.
-Josefine is done with her last exam ever. X'C Only scary projects left now.
-Josefine is probably gonna watch Earthlings tonight, in case you wake up tomorrow wondering why THE WHOLE UNIVERSE IS GONE.
-Josefine is still up after 22 h. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qdr9S6ExJcI.
-Josefine is Oscar-nominated for http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxDlQ0j7Knw.
-Josefine is still up after 23 hours... again. Driven by adrenaline, NIN, tea and maybe skinned dogs looking around.
-Josefine is desperately e-mailing her boss for more work.
-Josefine is staring suspiciously at and prodding her school projects, whilst sighing romantically over nin.com.
-Josefine is prodding her school projects suspiciously.
-Josefine is not totally unable to acknowledge the existence of her school projects, at least today! GO YOZE!
-Josefine is wondering what everyone thinks about http://www.gunshotsbycomputer.com/REDIRECT.html?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
-Josefine is happy that mediearkivet.se has kept the password that was handed out by J's teacher in... 1999.
-Josefine is thrilled to see that someone joined "I saw Earthlings". XD *NUDGE*
-Josefine is a bit offended that they finally removed the obligatory "is" from the status. She was up to the challenge ffs!
-Josefine is uploading photos of her dog to Webshots! Prepare to die!
-Josefine is stroking her profile pic.
-Josefine is not fluffy and white-haired... kinda.
-Josefine is off to infiltrate a Marilyn Manson gig!
-Josefine is paying some billz.
-Josefine is downloading 40000000000000000000000000000000000 remixes from http://remix.nin.com/. :9
-Josefine is learning a new scary paper district.
-Josefine is possibly relaxing.
-Josefine is reading?
-Josefine is reading The Children of Men and suspecting, after 7 pages, that it beats the movie. :D
-Josefine is hating the DRM-nazis at musikshop.gp.se. Anyone got "Still" by Nine Inch Nails? 'Twould kinda be legal.
-Josefine is watching Harry Potter 5 for the first time in 5 months! OMG!!!
-Josefine is gonna pop in at the fam xmas party, but not because she's a total slave under mindless traditions or anything! RAAAAAA!
-Josefine is alone at last. :9
-Josefine is hypnotised by some supposedly ultra-rare NIN tracks. Cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy cosy.
-Josefine is reading an evil/funny blog.
-Josefine is licking 2008's ass and sucking its moist toes.
-Josefine is listening to Year Zero.

Into the very bowels of Death I plunged!

But that's not all I did, this summer.

SUMMER CHRONICLE OF 2007!

I:

+Visited a wee but kickarse and überpopular veg*ism fair in Stockholm and gained 60 kg
+Moved back in with dear old Webshots
+Celebrated me Nick's 45th b-day wildly!
+Hung around the HP5 gala premiere in London!
+Hung around the HP5 gala premiere in OMG GOTHENBURG!
+Saw Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
+Listened to ALAN reading The return of the native by Thomas Hardy. :D It lasted all summer!
+Read Dracula by Bram Stoker
+Read Sagan om Isfolket: Trollbunden by Margit Sandemo
+Read Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen
+Read Bröderna Lejonhjärta by Astrid Lindgren
+Read Mio, min Mio by Astrid Lindgren
+Read Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by JK Rowling
+Read Män som hatar kvinnor by Stieg Larsson
+Read HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS BY JK ROWLING!
+Read Mansfield Park by Jane Austen
+Started reading Collapse by Jared Diamond
+Waited outside Justin Timberlake's hotel even though I don't listen to him. I think I saw him, but he was too quick for a picture.
+Waited outside The Rolling Stones' hotel even though I don't listen to them. I think I saw... *opens encyclopedia* ...Charlie Watts, but he was too quick for a picture. Oh, and the rest of them snuck out the back door to punish us infidels who hadn't bothered to get concert tix. :B
+Found me an apparently raaaaaare CD which I got as an LP in 1990 or 1991 (my 2nd or 3rd record ever...) but which I haven't listened to since the mid-90's and which I had been looking for since 2004 - Scandalo by Gianna Nannini :)
+Did that death-plunging. Aye. Very flashy. See, a zoo thingy (relatively good one) that cooperates with my uni program were a few guides short and they e-mailed my entire class, begging for our divine services which we had practised there this spring. I suppose everyone else was away = at home, or working in other flashy relevant jobs they could keep forever. But my paper round had just died on me, so I had no excuse... to tell the guide-hunter, or myself. :p I dug up my old guide material, neglected my summer book and hopped on the bus. Originally I was going to take 3 - THREE! - groups round the park, but it was cut down to 2. Some kinda relief. My employer seemed to think I was devastated about this. :B Well, I survived the guiding for now, barely. At least I got ADULTS. To make my stay (which included 1 hostel night, mmm) more worthwhile, I was kindly given some extra random work behind the scenes. I got to pick sticks and other debris out of an empty enclosure. Ahhh. It all added up to 2 full work days... :) Soooooo, from now on, when I rot among the live honey-dipped baby mice in the emperor's kitchen, or wherever I get to work post uni, I will FOREVER be able to say that ONCE IN MY LIFE I HELD A JOB WHICH HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH MY EDUCATION! XD Now... let's just FINISH UNI... *GULP*
+Got rid of my evil bro at last. Well, it was actually his idea to move out, but he said it was partly thanks to me as I "talk too much about Harry Potter." Hmmmmmmmmmm? :D
+Discovered Nine Inch Nails. See tomorrow's separate dissertation on the development of my little obsession. :D
+Got yet another paper district, now to be tamed each Sunday for all eternity! Wee! Or until I move. (I NEVER MENTION MOVING OUT, DO I?!) Almost next to the last one, and bigger. Walking, of course. Not too hilly, so I may survive the winter.

Post-Deathly Hallows numbness

WARNING - WARNING - WARNING - HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS SPOILERS AHEAD - WARNING - WARNING - WARNING

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Entwined with the 607 heroin-powdered pages of the LAST HARRY POTTER BOOK EVER, I was rolling and bouncing down a rocky slope towards the great swamp of eternity most of the time between 1am on July 21 and 1pm on July 23. :D

Ahhh, deliciously bitter-sweet. A FEW comments:

~Well, I always said I would rather want Severus dead and good than alive and bad... Obviously, alive, good and happy, with a chance to explain himself to Harry in person, would have been nothing to whine about, but JKR put him out of his misery. :'( At least I was not SURPRISED. However, I had sort of expected him to take a bullet Killing Curse for Harry, making the kid feel a little ashamed in the process. And now... If only Voldy had not misunderstood things, Severus and Harry might have had clinked their Butterbeers together the same night to calm their nerves... XC (Hmm, that sounded pervy...) At least he did much else.

~Dead Lupin. Very quick, and my relief over Snape made up for some of it... I only fear for my Thewlisian's mental well-being once SHE is done reading. Pretty though she is, her reaction shan't be. :O At least fate saved the happy, shiny part of Remus's life for last, and Dora went with him and Teddy was too young to know... :/

~Aye... The Lily/Severus shippers spoke true! :O I had read their arguments, which made sense - I suppose the idea was merely too cool to hope for in canon. And it was not only a crush from Sev... BEST FRIENDS. *SNIFF* Had there been no Sorting... Had Sev been in Gryffindor and not in the BAD COMPANY... Had he not gone all pseudo-racist on Lily... Had Lily forgiven the remorseful and well-meaning Sev... Poor Severus! "Always." *jumps out the headmaster's friggin office window* He took no Killing Curse, but risked all for many years just for Harry...s mum.

~When Petunia mentioned "that awful boy" in Order (page 34, UK edition) she meant SEVERUS, not James! It would have been SO funny if Harry had somehow realised this at the time. XD And also a major spoiler, soooooo.

~If the moviemakers do not stop and wallow in The Prince's tale I will... I will... crush my popcorn box like... like a popcorn box in my ragingly trembling fist.
I don't care for popcorn.

~With Severus satisfyingly good and tragically deceased, I decided to finish the book in a cosy forest. It was raining, so I sat under The Ewan Umbrella, on a rock by a wee waterfall. (Shivering, not necessarily because of cold, so HAHA!)

JKR: "As I was saying, Harry was fed up with adventure so he married Ginny and they produced some offspring named James, Albus and Lily. DUH."
RATEXLA: "Naturally, but damn, didn't ANYONE name their kid after Severus? Oh well, maybe as a middle name... I'll just pretend that they did."
BOOK: *draws its final breaths*
HARRY: "Albus Severus..."
RATEXLA: *SODASPRAY*
HARRY: "...you were named for two headmasters of Hogwarts. One of them was a Slytherin and he was probably the bravest man I ever knew."
RATEXLA: "BAWL!"

TRELAWNEY -91: *stumbles into great hall* "Zup? Did you know, I was just zapping through my crystal ball and guess what I found out? 15 years from now, Potter will name his kid after you, Sev. Bye."
SEVERUS: *TEASPRAY*
HARRY: "Ewww... and... EWWWWW!"

~Only after Harry takes the last train will Severus know that he forgave and honoured him.

~When Severus first said "Look... at... me" I assumed he wanted to convey the information to Harry via eye-contact... After all, he couldn't be certain Harry would make it to the Pensieve. When I went back for a second read about his death and tale, even I got that he wanted to... look into LILY'S EYES FOR THE FINAL TIME... X'C

~Is it just me, or was Albus Severus Potter totally the most SPEEEEEEEEEECIAL kid in Potter-the-next-generation? SPIN-OFF MATERIAL. James II was just rowdy James I. Lily was cool like Ginny, but Albus Severus alone resembled Harry... looks-wise AT LEAST... and it was hinted that he was SERIOUS. Sniff! Severus would have liked that the one with Lily's eyes was named after him. :')

And here are me old comments on Prince, including my favourite Snape Is Good arguments. :)

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This morning, near the close of my paper round, I saw a doe. :) (Hell, not of the same species as THAT doe, but.) *wants silver pendant*

Wee job + Ewan + The return of the native + photos

Today marks 3 YEARS since I "met" ALAN... :D And 34 days from now I will be back behind the barricades at LEICESTER SQUARE! I wonder if Alan will attend, however, cuz I hear he's doing some wine movie in Cali "this summer".

But yesterday was also goody-good-good:

1. Somebody rang. Twas for me. They said they were the paper people. I dropped dead, for I had been told that any negative answer to my paper girl application would arrive by mail. :D

Woman: "...Soooooo, we've got a car district for you [10 km away]! :D"
Yozeheart: *floorsplat*
Yoze: "Er... I'm afraid I was mostly after a walking district, cuz I won't have as much access to the car this year." (The car is going to Norway for 1 week - like last year, when I got time off, so I didn't want to ask this time, and anyway, my folks didn't like the car-manhandling, the car didn't like carrying around papers *SCREECH* *BURN* *BANG*, and I think my knee didn't like to hit the pedals 400 times a day (3 s after I quit, the car went to the shop and the pedals became MUCH easier to move...), and I didn't like casting a shadow of death on wheels & cats. I didn't say all that though, sounds whiny and picky. (As it is, I sound more like I have irresponsibly lost me license.) Oh, and a few people could probably have walked around my 30 km ex-district and saved some petrol. Not that they won't find drivers now, I'm just sayin.)
Woman: "Oh! We can probably fix THAT! [YOU get to pick & choose between our 6000000 districts FIRST OF ALL cuz WE WANT YOU!]"
Yozeheart: *PING!*
Woman: "Lessee, there IS a walking district [1 km away], July 16 to August 11, and could you do 2 additional Sundays before then? Then I think it would be best if you trained with the Sunday girl twice before that. [Training = pay :) ] I shall mail you all the info."
Yoze: "THAT'S FUCKING FABULOUS!" (I did not say.)
Woman: "Btw, I see now that the Sunday girl wanted to be on holiday until... Hmm, could you do August 12 as well?"
Yoze: "SQUEE!"

Not loads of hours of course... But I will get freedom (from visible customers & long days), EXERCISE!, roedeer sightings, references, cat encounters AND money. Hehe, paid to take morning walks thru a cute neighbourhood and the heavy floral scents welling out of nightly gardens. I don't think my feet like 2 h walks, but it's been done before. Deal with it, feet.

I'll try to bring the ole CD walkman.

This autumn I will of course ask again at that book shop. Whimper! Among other things. Most likely I will not get it, but maybe a paper district... The lady who rang said they had better give me my own cart and such "because that would be simplest if you won't see the weekday person... And maybe you would get a reason to keep the stuff..." Hehe. A Sunday morning job, mmm... Only 2-3 hours a week, SO ONE HAS TIME TO STUDY OR SUMMAT, but the pay ain't horrible.

Also good for filling out whatever shit salary I will get post-uni, if I get a hatable real job (40 h/week) then.

2. The old ER ep starring Ewan aired! I knew, and deeved it. He was fab. (As he will be in OTHELLO, played on a London stage from DECEMBER TO FEBRUARY, so it may coincide with the London premiere of SWEENEY TODD, which of course stars ALAN and SACHA, and I would not hate to see JOHNNY either, which is quite possible now that I have secured some INCOME... *COUGH* Uhhhh, I want me winter schedule.)

3. My audiobook arrived - The return of the native by Thomas Hardy, read by ALAN. 15 h 45 min of THE VOICE! ON CD, AT LAST! I will save the sweet shit for summer = after June 1. Or 2. I took my bike and picked it up near MY NEW DISTRICT, which I'm not very familiar with, so I rode in there and said hello to all my new mailboxes. Soon you will be MINE, ONLY MINE!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA! I hope the box/house numbering is better than it seemed.

4. Someone contacted me about horsie pix, she will possibly pay for some.

Harry Potter & summer jobs

There is finally time to read proper books without feeling the homework's hot breath down my neck. So I recently licked up Order of the Phoenix, to freshen it up before the movie, and to get into the story before I reread Half-blood Prince, so that I can be in the right mood when Deathly Hallows arrives... :D And -
a) I kind of wish they wouldn't release movie 5 and book 7 so close together. Joy, like sunflower spread, is at least as good when... well, spread out. :p
b) Order is not my fave HP book, but now I can't wait for the feckin film. Feck. Bits I look forward to the most:
-Snape
-Puppy-Snape
-Lucius
-Lupin
-Thestrals :D
-Umbridge
-The trio
-Luna
-The kiss

*sleeps till then*

~*~

I still have no summer job. LOSER!!! Interviews done:
-Er, restaurant. ("We'll keep your application.")
-Another, er, restaurant of the same chain. ("I just wanted to make it clear that you did not get selected.")
-Big grocery shop ("I haven't got a job for you at the moment but I'd like to keep your application.")
-Wee grocery shop ("We found so many ex-employees. Yes, some other time, maybe.")
-Book shop *whimper* ("We chose this guy... But then there is autumn and Xmas, I'm saving your application here.")
-Universeum (Great flashy attractive science centre with whose chief of staff my dad is acquainted - I want any job there but this was about a guide job! The mere interview invitation feels flashy. :) *frames printed e-mail* "I don't believe you would complete the group at this time, but you are welcome to try again." I now have license to nag at them 2008-2047.)

Interviews spoken of but yet to be conducted/booked:
-Paper girl!
-Standing around town, handing out free morning papers (Sounds cosy enough, but too easy to be flashy)

If I don't get a proper job, the alternatives are:
-I hope I can do some voluntary work 120 km up north, except I'm not sure there would be anywhere affordable to stay. But it's possible. And flashy.
-Sell CD's crammed with photos from equestrian events. I might earn like 20 SEK.
-Intensify my shooting of showjumpers and the advertising about it.
-Dog-walking.
-[CENSORED] (Nuthin criminal.)

Crude whippin/carrotting of our great big arses

There are 1,8 hectares of biologically productive land per person. The average human uses 2,2 hectares. 20% of the people are sitting on 80% of the resources.

Fun eh!

Large eco-feet = wealth = independence = opportunity to TELL ONE'S 0.5 GRAMS OF WHINING DNA TO GO JUMP IN THE LAKE!

Generally... right?

I don't fecking know how to get down to 1,8 hectares, really. But it might work comfily. www.earthday.org/footprint offers some guidance with their quizzz. Here is how I can HOPE I will be able to respond to each question for the better part of my life, + my comments.
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How big is the city, town, or place where you live?
-100,001 - 1,000,000
(Above 500 000, I believe.)

What city has the most similar weather to yours?
-Gothenburg
(This does require some heating. But I think I'm on nuke power right now. Thank gawd, that may sustain us until we are down to the recommended 100 million (HAAHAAAAAAA, I originally happened to write "100 000", ehehe, sniffle...) people and can get along on renewable energy. (Maybe we already can, but I hear different things.) I also heard that Homo sapiens is unusally bad at coping with radiation, but that in general, nature looks great around... Tjernobyl. :O Hmm. Mmm. Heh... Hope it's true.)

Food footprint
How often do you eat animal based products? (beef, pork, chicken, fish, eggs, dairy products)
-Never (vegan)
(This is already true! :D And tasty. *feeds you* According to a survey, most Swedes are ready to cut down on the meat for the sake of the environment. Hey, once they break the habit a little bit, and discover a few 1000 adjusted recepies, there's no telling where they'll end up. :D )

How much of the food that you eat is processed, packaged and imported?
-Very little. Most of the food I eat is unprocessed, unpackaged and locally grown.
(I think this means less than 25%. Hardly true at present. NativeEnergy may sustain us until we are down to the... bla bla.)

Goods footprint
Compared to people in your neighborhood, how much waste do you generate?
-Much less
(Er... I'm not so sure about this one either. But I recycle, I don't CONSTANTLY buy new clothes/electronics, and when I move out no maniacs will stop some compost thingy from moving in.)

Shelter footprint
How many people live in your household?
-1 person
(I dunno what's better. But I'm the queen loner, after all. I'll try that if I can afford it.)

What is the size of your home?
-20 square metres or smaller
(This is not the size of our house...! But HELL YEAH, I can do that! When I move I hope there will be such a tiny, cosy, adorable, cheap place available for my great wasteful arse. IT BETTER!!! *moves to shanty town*)

Which housing type best describes your home?
-Green-design residence
(Like an eco-village? I'd LIKE that. :p Never seen one in my life. Did a wee bit of research last week. What if there was one reasonably close to an eco-bean farmer and a city bus line... and with small apartments... Anyway, that along with the other answers apparently would leave me with a footprint of... 1,3 HECTARES!)
-Multi-story apartment building
(This is where I will probably end up, but I might still have a footprint of precisely... THE MAGICAL 1,8 HECTARES!)

Do you have electricity in your home?
-Yes, with energy conservation and efficiency
(Hmm, can solar panels produce electricity or just heat? :B Sniff... I don't have solar panels. Today.)

Mobility footprint
On average, how far do you travel on public transportation each week (bus, train, subway or ferry) ?
-1-25 km
(No idea about this either... But supposing it's not physically impossible to build THAT ECO-VILLAGE close to town... One could take the bike in summer, too... And since I won't FIND any eco-villages, and the apartment building would work, the answer is reasonable. I need to take after my gran, who uses her bike like hell. Right now I live 5000000 km, OK, 10 bus minutes, from the city. And the air is lethal.)

On average, how far do you go by motorbike each week (as a driver or passenger)?
-0 km
(I've gone 20 m on a motorbike in me life, and Joaquin never picks me up on his. :O )

On average, how far do you go by car each week (as a driver or passenger)?
-0 km
(IRL I REALLY need to drive... as good as never. :D If I ever buy a car, fecking shoot me. Unless I join a big car pool, or get one because my FANCY JOB REQUIRES it. If I then use it in unnecessary = non-professional situations, SHOOT ME! Expensive buggers they are, too.)

Do you bicycle, walk, or use animal power to get around?
-Most of the time
(Some exercise wouldn't kill me... It depends on how far that perfect eco-village/cosy apartment would be from town, though.)

Approximately how many hours do you spend flying each year?
-Never fly
(I mean... because... NativeEnergy... can sustain us until... the planes can run on bio-fuel or the BOAT AND TRAIN ARE RE-INVENTED! WHY THE FECK IS THERE NO BOAT BETWEEN GOTHENBURG AND ANYWHERE NEAR LONDON?! I'm talking technical possibilities here. Actually, I'm thinking about trying to take the train/bus instead of plane to France next year, at least one way. :D What an adventure. Not to mention... er... New Zealand. DAMN CHEAP FLIGHTS! I can't wait for 1000 kmph vacuum tunnel hover trains to be developed. My classmate mentioned 'em.)
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OMFG IT COULD WORK! According to the test... and me... EVERYBODY could be comfy. Comfier if there were fewer people.

WTF! Just read The future of life by Edward O. Wilson. He says it all better than I do. I can lend ya this motivating book.

The quizmakers write:
"...some options that could make your Footprint smaller are not available to you as a result of choices on the part of local decision makers, such as reliable and efficient public transportation as an alternative to driving. Therefore, an important path to reducing your Footprint is to advocate for more sustainable decisions at all levels of government."
Indeed! :p *cheers on SNF*

~*~
Here be me holy pledge. Which is probably not enough, so... Beat me, to show me how. Beat me, you fat Westerners. And enlighten me. If I break my pledge, feed me to your 14 children.

~I will estimate my yearly greenhouse gas emissions and try to offset them.

~I will never fly domestic in Sweden (it's been a while, anyway...)

~I will support TNC's Rainforest Fund or the like at least until I can assume they've received enough to save an area as large as my ecological arse-print (a handful of hectares at the mo, probably)... asap. And UNICEF if possible.

~I will constantly be a member of an environmental organisation

~I will not buy my own fossil-fueled car for non-professional purposes

~I will buy organic and/or locally produced food & clothes (plus 2nd hand clothes) as often as reasonably possible (that means, unless they cost 100 000 000, taste/look exactly like poo or do not exist)

~I will not take my mobile phone, TV, VCR, camera or computer to the scrap heap until they die of natural causes... Sell them, mayhap. (It would not surprise me if everybody already does this :p but at least my folks are fond of throwing away functioning objects. :p ) I hope they get recycled efficiently from the scrap heap.

~I will not leave the TV or comp in stand-by mode (DVD and VCR switch themselves off... or do they?!)

~I will recycle

~I will not subscribe to the morning paper (My folks do and I am addicted now, but when I move I will quit and read it online, or read the free city papers before giving those back to... society. When I was da paper-girl, I beheld ~365 morning papers... every day)

~I will use low-energy lamp bulbs (at least in my room, for now...)

~I will cook loads and rarely rather than a little every day

~I will never eat meat, eggs or milk (unless, you know, I crash in the Andes or something...! :)

~I will always vote environmental

~I will produce no offspring

~I will bequeath (sp) all that I own to charity (HAHA, WON'T BE MUCH! THERE WON'T BE MUCH LEFT TO SAVE EITHER! XC )